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Satire: What if Premier League managers were teachers?

Rishabh Gupta
Published

what if premier league managers were teachers

It is September 5 and we are celebrating Teachers’ day. Managers also play the role of teachers, but what if they were actually teachers?

In club football, the role of a manager is almost identical to that of a teacher. You even get summers-off! So what if the Premier League managers leave their jobs right now, and show up at a school near you?

What if Premier League managers were actually teachers? Let’s take a look!

Jose Mourinho (Man Utd) – Mourinho would make a good English teacher, wouldn’t he? After all, he has invented a lot of catch-phrases on his own – “The Special One”, “Specialist in Failure”, “I prefer not to speak”..

And oh, he does know how to teach students to “RESPECT! RESPECT! RESPECT!” their elders.

Pep Guardiola (Man City) – He’s the type who remain strict with their students and give them a lot of homework. He’s obsessed about everyone ‘passing’ in his subject and created a school record last year when every student scored 100 points under him.

Unai Emery (Arsenal) – A Maths teacher, obviously. He’s obsessed with charts and diagrams, focusses on acute details and wants complete precision. His students are annoyed, though, because the previous teacher had been in the job for 22 years and handed out the same question paper every semester.

Jurgen Klopp (Liverpool) – Mad evil science teacher. Loves taking students to labs and waits for a chemical reaction to backfire, just so he can yell ‘BOOOM!’.

He has his issues.

Also read: Lopetegui on Ronaldo’s transfer: ‘I never spoke with him’

Maurizio Sarri (Chelsea) – He takes his students to the roof and smokes-up with them. A proper dream professor for everyone. Introduced his own theory and even added it to the curriculum this year, though.

Mauricio Pochettino (Tottenham) – Doesn’t involve himself in the staff-room wars, and gets decent results most of the time. His class was initially very weak in European geography, but slowly learning things now.

(This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner.)

About the author

Rishabh Gupta

Rishabh Gupta

A sports enthusiast. Sports, I believe, is one of the few powers which help us grow, both as an individual and society. With each day, in the rich world of sports, I grow.

Read more from Rishabh Gupta

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