If a young NBA player is looking for pointers on how to refine his midrange jumper, Dwyane Wade can probably give him a few tips. If he’s looking for help on finishing through contact, same deal. But if he’s looking for advice on how to have a healthy marriage, he’s going to have to call somebody else.
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That’s not to say that Wade doesn’t know a thing or two about successful relationships. He’s been married to actress Gabrielle Union for just over 11 years and together they’ve raised a beautiful family while reigning as one of the preeminent Hollywood-sports world power couples.
Wade knows what makes his relationship work and continues to adapt and work at it each day, but he recognizes that what works for him won’t necessarily work for someone else.
“My marriage tip, I heard Ice-T say this. And I thought that this was very important for everybody out there,” Wade said. “Ice-T said people are always coming up to him asking him about marriage — how do you do it, can you give me some marriage advice, and Ice-T said, ‘I know how to be married to my wife, I don’t know how to be married to yours.'”
“That right there is the marriage tip. I’m still learning how to be married to my wife. I ain’t got no marriage tip for nobody else out there, ’cause I don’t know your wife. I don’t know your relationship. So please, don’t take anything I say and apply it to your marriage, because it goes for my wife.”
Ice-T and his wife Coco Austin have been married for over 23 years, so like Wade and Union, whatever they’re doing seems to be working. Every situation is different though, so unless you’re a rapper and star of Law and Order: SVU or a Hall-of-Fame 2-guard with a Finals MVP trophy on the mantle, it’s probably best to seek marital advice from someone in a more relatable situation.
Wade didn’t necessarily violate his no marital advice clause a minute later, but he did give some words of wisdom to help anybody navigate their own love lives. “You gotta know who you are in the relationship with,” he said. “You gotta know why you’re in that relationship with that person, and you gotta focus on that.”
He also said that he doesn’t give out parenting advice for the same reason. What works for his kids may not work for someone else’s. “Even though people are always asking or saying, ‘Oh you guys are great parents’ or ‘You guys are not,’ whatever it is, I know how to parent my kids, I know how to be married to my wife, obviously for 11 years. And there’s so much still to learn in both processes.”
“But I don’t know yours, so don’t ask me.”
