“Billionaires, What are You Doing?”: David Spade Tells Rich Eisen Why He Would Never Go Exploring Deep Sea in a Submersible

Having appeared across multiple stages, you might wonder if David Spade would be willing to take his signature sarcasm to the depths of the ocean—literally—if given the chance. After all, with a net worth of $70 million, he certainly has the means to explore uncharted territory.

But the answer is a firm no.

Spade has no interest in diving into the unknown, whether beneath the ocean or beyond the Earth. To him, such adventures are nothing more than fools’ errands for bored billionaires with too much time and money. One major reason for his reluctance? A deep fear of the ocean.

During a recent appearance on The Rich Eisen Show, Spade opened up to Eisen about why you’ll never find him risking his life in a deep-sea submersible (unlike some other rich folks). While he once thought those little underwater vessels looked fun, that changed dramatically after the 2023 OceanGate disaster, when a sub imploded en route to the Titanic wreck site, killing all five passengers on board.

“Remember when that little sub went to look for the Titanic? Sometimes, I miss that crazy little sub because it looked like fun in the beginning, but the ending went a little sideways. First off, billionaires, what are you doing? Why do they want to go to the bottom of the ocean or to Mars? What’s wrong with the surface of the planet? I’m rich. I find things to do right here. You can keep busy.”

Among the victims were OceanGate CEO Stockton Rush, British-Pakistani businessman Shahzada Dawood and his son Suleman, British explorer Hamish Harding, and former French navy diver Paul-Henry Nargeolet.

That tragedy hit home for Spade. It was a harsh reminder that such extreme excursions come with real, deadly risks. He sees no reason to gamble his life or fortune chasing adrenaline. As he explained, the submersibles themselves aren’t exactly inviting—cramped, pitch-black, and claustrophobic, they offer little comfort and plenty of reasons to stay on dry land.

Well, David is also not crazy about space, either.

Spade won’t be sitting in a space shuttle anytime soon

The private space industry is experiencing a major boom, with billionaires like Elon Musk, Richard Branson, and Jeff Bezos leading the charge into space tourism. Most recently, Bezos’s company, Blue Origin, made headlines by launching an all-female crew into space—the first mission of its kind since 1963.

The flight, conducted on Blue Origin’s New Shepard rocket, was a suborbital journey that marked a significant milestone in private space exploration. But while the achievement is historic, it came at an extraordinary cost. The passengers trained for months and spent millions—if not billions—for just a two-minute experience in space.

To David Spade, that’s hardly a fair trade. He doesn’t see the value in risking life and limb—or shelling out a fortune—for such a fleeting thrill.

“I wouldn’t even do that space one, the women one. A little overhyped. The training, the seriousness of it. I was in the Concorde. It was probably more than what they did.”

David Spade is one of the most recognizable faces in the world of comedy. Known for his self-deprecating and sarcastic humor, often showcased in his frequent collaborations with Adam Sandler, Spade recently released his first stand-up special with Amazon Prime Video. Titled Dandelion, it marks his fourth comedy special overall, following Nothing Personal (2022) on Netflix, My Fake Problems (2014) on Comedy Central, and Take the Hit (1998) on HBO.